You’ve probably heard that “approaching girls is a numbers game.” It most certainly is.
Guru’s and PUA coaches who push the idea of the ‘perfect approach’ are exaggerating their own results.
I want you to start thinking of each approach as if you are simply ‘running a program’ or ‘doing your job.’
Most guys who freak out about running the perfect ‘sets’ are usually the ones most obsessed with doing things perfectly from day one.
I’ve filmed a video describing this entire process here as well: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sjIoJO7Sk9I
Game is Practice.
Start thinking of game as practice.
The more you practice, the more relaxed, confident, and assertive you become.
With that said, I want to give you a roadmap you can begin to follow and consistently pick up girls.
This does not mean that you will pick up every single girl. Not even close.
You will face a lot of ‘rejection.’ That is inevitable.
Much of the success in game comes from the ability to deal with the rejections, harsh reactions, and occasional drama.
The Five Finger System:
1. Comfort = Thumb
2. Hook = Forefinger
3. Sexuality = Middle Finger
4. Isolate = Ring Finger
5. Close = Pinky
What She’s Thinking: Is this person safe? Are they dangerous, crazy, or a threat?
Why Is Comfort Important? No woman is going to sleep with you if she feels unsafe. She cannot feel any positive emotional states around you if she feels that you are a threat.
Women get regularly approached by guys that are indeed dangerous.
If you ask women on the whole, if they have felt like their life was in danger in the last month. The majority will actually say yes.
This may come as a shock to most men, since as men we don’t feel threatened very often.
However, most women are walking around living with the threat of psychotic or violent men.
Also, women get approached many times a week by needy guys. A needy guy is like an overbearing or pushy salesman. Or a homeless person demanding change.
When women sense that you need a positive reaction, a phone number, validation, or sex; they are repulsed.
How Do We Create Comfort?
For newer guys, I tell them their approach should be very low pressure, relaxed, and spoken with a positive tonality.
You simply are ‘running the line.’ Like a robot or a computer.
It’s not meant to create ‘attraction’ or ‘connection.’ It’s simply meant to open a dialogue with the girl.
Remove all the pressure from yourself. There is no need to ‘create’ attraction. Simply run the lines and remember that there are other women in the world.
Examples Of Low Pressure Lines To Begin the Conversation:
“Hey, do you know where there’s a good bar around here? I’m new here and you seem like you might know.”
“Hey, you seem cool. Hi, I’m Brad.”
“Hey, you look cute. I’m Brad.”
“Hey, do you know where there’s a good coffee shop around here? I’m new here and you seem cool.”
“Hey, how do you guys like this place? I’m new here.”
“Hey, you girls seem cool. Hi, I’m Brad.”
These lines should be delivered in a low pressure, relaxed manner, as if running these lines are not a big deal at all.
What Is She Thinking? You’ve already demonstrated that you’re not-needy, and safe. Now she is thinking, “Is this person going to be fun to talk to? Will he make me feel good? Or, will I have to make him feel good because he doesn’t make me feel good?” In other words… “Is he cool?”
How Do We Hook? A very simple way to separate yourself from the hordes of men out there who approach girls is to add energy to the interaction. You’re going to have to engage her, and talk.
Here is a simple formula to consistently hook:
Ask a question + Make an assumption.
Below are some sample questions and assumptions.
You: “Where are you from? (question) Wait… Let me guess… (Pause and look at her.) You look like you’re from New Jersey.”
Her: Oh my god! How can you say that! Hahaha! I’m from Brooklyn.
You: Oh okay, haha! What do you do? Wait… also let me guess. (Pause. Look at her in the eyes.) You’re most definitely a journalist.
Her: Hahaha! I’m so not that. I’m an accountant. Where are you getting these? Hilarious. This is fun.
You: What’s your favorite type of music? I’m gonna hazard another guess. 90’s Hip Hop… I’m certain of it.
Her: OMG it’s like you’re in my head!
Women are attracted to competence, and men that can lead. Most men do not lead, and are incompetent at approaching.
You stand out significantly if you can lead the conversation.
The Typical Guy:
Your average guy at the bar who approaches girls does not add positive energy to the girls night. At best, he will drunkenly complement her, offer to buy her a drink (read: bribe her,) and try to use her beauty to bolster his emotional state.
Typical Guy Conversation:
Guy: “Hey………. You’re really beautiful………….What is your name?”
Girl: “Oh Hi, I’m Jeanette.”
Guy: “Hi Jeanette………….. So what do you do?”
Girl: “I’m an accountant.”
Guy: “Cool. You’re really hot.”
Girl: “Thanks. I gotta go to the bathroom.”
Guy: “Can I buy you a drink?”
Girl: “Maybe later. Be right back.”
Even without looking at what type of emotional state the guy is in (probably drunk and bumbling) this structure of conversation doesn’t add anything to the girls night.
It is subtracting energy from her.
He isn’t cool in her mind. He isn’t fun.
You want her to think to herself… This guy is cool or funny, or fun. That’s what hooking is all about.
After Questions + Assumptions:
At this point you’ll want to joke around, talk about fun light hearted topics and ‘vibe’ for a short time.
What Is She Thinking?
This guy is cool, and fun. I feel good around him. Is he a friend, a boyfriend potentially, or a guy I could fuck right now?
Your Job Is To Force Her To Make That Decision:
At this stage, you need to sexualize the interaction. Most guys, are afraid of ‘ruining’ the nice conversation you’ve created. However, you must keep your goal in mind. Your goal is to sleep with the girl. Not to have a nice conversation.
Once you sexualize the conversation, she will either not accept your advances (friend), slow you down from making advances too soon (boyfriend or maybe hook up later), or accepts them (down to fuck.)
Give Her The Chance To Choose:
Most guys are deeply afraid of taking this step. But if you don’t give the girl the chance to choose nothing is going to happen.
Most phone numbers flake, girls have a lot of options and once another guy enters the picture (very often happens the same day) you may become an afterthought.
The most reliable way to develop a great sex life is to have sex with girls quickly.
Physical and Verbal Escalation:
There are two ways to overtly escalate. Physically, and verbally.
A fairly innocuous way to escalate is with this line.
“By the way. You’re sooo tiny.”
You say this with a sexual tone of voice.
Another innocuous way of escalating physically is like this.
“Hey, let’s play thumb of war.” Extend your hand and take her hand.
Start playing… once playing say, “If I win I get to do whatever I want with you.” Have a sexual smirk on your face when you say this.
Pin her thumb (don’t let her win) and say,
“Now I get to do whatever I want with you.”
If she accepts this, you’ll want to quickly move to the next step. If she slows you down you back off and continue joking with her and throwing in sexual remarks and double entendres.
“That’s what she said.”
“My friend said you have a nice ass.”
“Mine is better though.”
If she doesn’t accept this, or doesn’t want to be sexual with you take her phone number and move on to the next girl.
What Is She Thinking?
I like this guy, he is hot and I’m getting turned on. But I can’t appear like a slut in front of my friends. I wish we could be alone together so we could hook up.
What Is Your Job?
Your job here is to move her away from her friends so that she doesn’t feel judged. Once that happens you and her can share a kiss, and some physical escalation.
“Hey, come with me to the other part of the bar real quick I want to get another drink.”
“Hey, follow me real quick I want to show you something.”
Take her by the hand and lead her out of sight of her friends. This doesn’t need to be extreme. It can be as small as two feet away, as long as she moves and out of the direct line of sight of the friends.
Pull her close, slide your hand up the nape of her neck and support the back of her head as you kiss her.
You can tease her a bit here… pull away after about 2-3 seconds of kissing and say,
“That was about a 5/10 kiss. You could do better.”
Kiss her again.
Once you’ve kissed her, you don’t want to over-validate her and get super hot and heavy in the bar/daytime.
If you over-validate the girl she will not go home with you.
Hang out, dance with her joke around for a minute. Then further build the sexual vibe… which leads to
What Is She Thinking?
This guy is super hot, I’m horny, but I’m worried about what my friends will think and I hope he knows what he’s doing.
The “friends” are the most significant obstacle when it comes to pulling the girl home.
Very often, your girls friends will rip her away from you without hesitation if they think she’s going to leave with you.
The best way to deal with this is to 1. Move Her Outside 2. Tell Her What To Say To Her Friends.
Move Her Outside:
“Hey, it’s hot in here. Come with me.”
Take her by the hand and lead her outside (out of the sight of her friends.)
Make out with her some more, and say
“lets get out of here, tell your friends I’ll have you back in 20 minutes. Text them, “we’re going to another bar nearby we’ll be back in 20 minutes.”
“lets go to this afterparty. I’ll have you back in 20 minutes.”
Get an Uber back to your house and close the deal.
At Your House:
What Is She Thinking?
Most likely your girl is feeling a mixture of emotions at this point. On one hand, she is likely horny and excited to see what type of experience she’s going to have with you. On the other she doesn’t want to feel like a slut, or doing something wrong.
How Do We Deal With Her Mixture Of Emotions?
Much like in every other situation, you want to take the lead and make her want to have sex. You also have to remove the responsibility from her shoulders. Most (not all) girls will not overtly lead you to sex.
Expect Last Minute Resistance.
Last Minute Resistance (L.M.R.) is a predictable behavior pattern that most girls will display before they sleep with a guy they like.
The girl will ‘freeze up’ or give you covert/overt signals that she doesn’t want you to escalate to sex. This can happen in any number of different moments during your build up to sex.
- Unhooking her bra
- Feeling her ass
- Feeling her pussy
- Putting her hand on your cock
- Allowing you to penetrate her
You must expect this and pace yourself for the long haul if she doesn’t immediately want to fuck.
Too many guys simply ‘give up’ and send the girl home if she doesn’t immediately want to have sex.
The best way to get consent is to escalate smoothly when the girl has a high buying temperature. When she has a high emotional spike this is a great time to escalate to sex.
You want to look and see if she is actually comfortable or she is tensing up, or not receptive to your escalation.
In this case take two steps back, relax, and then try again later in a different way.
Fake Rape Charges
An important point to mention in this entire process is to protect yourself against fake rape charges.
Too often in our culture now a days, girls will lie and accuse men of rape when in fact the sex was completely consensual.
How to defend yourself against this is to run good game, and use a voice recorder to record your pull and the sex.
This way, it will keep you from doing or saying anything that is stupid and also if the girl lies and tries to ruin your life with a fake rape charge you can defend yourself in court.
*Fun Fact* Voice recordings are admissible in NY State Courts. (Not Legal Advice I Am Not A Lawyer)
Why Would She Lie?
Women follow a dualistic mating strategy. They will often times cheat on their husbands or boyfriends behind their back and have sex with a man very quickly. If they feel guilty about this or get caught… they may lie about it.
Don’t get caught in this trap and make sure you protect yourself.
Tactics For Closing Smoothly
1. Have alcohol, mix her a drink upon arriving to your apartment.
2. Play music, or pop on a comedy… something light hearted that isn’t going to require you to sit down and focus watching it.
3. Kiss her, pick her up like a newlywed, and carry her to the bed… or throw her on the bed.
4. If she is into being dominated or rough sex, pin her to the door and slam your hand into the door for a loud dramatic effect as you kiss her and escalate.
5. Lightly pull her hair above nape of her neck.
6. Nibble her neck and ears.
7. Put her hand on your hard cock. Take it out.
8. Have condoms in your pocket or next to your bed or behind your pillows.
9. If she won’t escalate on the couch, move to the kitchen, if not the kitchen move to the bed. Girls are strange and very emotional creatures.
10. Massage her back with coconut oil, have her take her pants off and massage her ass and thighs tease her pussy area. Kiss her butt and back and neck. Turn her over and kiss her.
There are no guarantees that you will retain these girls… after all you did sleep with them very quickly.
However, some things you can do to increase your success with keeping the girls around are.
Have a sick apartment.
- Have a big dick
- Have a great body
- Make her orgasm multiple times.
- Have great game.
- Don’t be needy at all… in fact almost view her as an inconvenience.
- Share breakfast in the morning
- Kick her out early in the morning (you’ll have to experiment… if she seems like a sweet average girl maybe don’t do this one.)
- Wait for her to text you instead of you texting her. If she doesn’t text you after you do all of the above move on until she does.
Typical Insecurities That Impede Closing
“I don’t know what to do!”
- “I’ve never been with a girl this hot!”
- “My dick isn’t big enough!“
- “I don’t have enough experience and can’t please a woman!”
- “My body is gross!”
- “I’m not sure she’s gonna be hot enough!”
- “I’m not sure if I’m gonna get hard!”
Here are some solutions for you if this is an issue.
- Quit watching porn. It dramatically skews your perceptions of what real sex is like.
- Remember… most girls have fucked guys uglier and less successful than you. (They’ve been in high school and college. All guys there are broke and inexperienced.)
- Buy a Bathmate Water Pump, and Sizegenetics Penis Extender. You can gain dramatic amounts of size rapidly by using these. Especially the Bathmate. Sizegenetics is for length, Bathmate is for girth.
- Girls know that the first time having sex is usually the worst and most awkward. Don’t sweat it.
- Hit the gym, start doing cardio, and eating right.
- If she’s hot enough to open, she’s hot enough to close.
- Take Cialis before going out.
Talk Soon Guys! If you’re interested in taking some training with me e-mail me here Brad.Holiday1@gmail.com and check out LuxLifePickup.com